While Susan is away I refuse to feed the cats or change my shirt, but I will keep up with the movie reviews:

The New World (2005) tells the story of Pocahontas and John Smith (a romance made famous by the Peggy Lee tune “Fever”) and the birth of Virginia. Colin Farrell plays Captain John Smith and is apparently only three years older than I am. Q’Orianka Kilcher is Pocahontas/Rebecca. Director Terrence Malick’s telling of this tale is told richly and thusly . . . oh, who am I fooling: CHRISTIAN BALE ALERT!!!!

Farrell’s tribal tattoos make less sense while being held captive by an actual tribe, but kudos to Malick for keeping it real. It’s jarring to watch a period piece that doesn’t feature Colin Firth or D.J. Dench. I also kept expecting John Smith to hurry in before the wedding. History means nothing to me.

After hearing Dan Brown’s “Moment in Time” version of the love story last week I had a hard time trusting the accuracy of the film. I liked The New World. It wasn’t what I expected it to be, and I thought it was filmed beautifully. The ending was very arty/parody of an art film and that was annoying. It’s hard to discuss movies, but all my people know what “four stars” means.

This morning I killed a baby camel cricket with my index finger. I don’t give a shit anymore.

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